Freitag, 4. Juli 2008
"my morals got me on my knees, I'm begging please stop playing games...."
prezzel, 17:58h
I seriously think I am losing my mind.... slowly but I'm losing it. Everytime I see you I want to throw little objects at you. Like a pencil case or something similar. It takes all of my might to control myself not to yell at you. To tell you all the things that are going on in my mind. I sit still in my chair or stand there not moving every single time you walk by in order not to do something completely stupid. And whenever I began to relax I tell myself that it's only a few days until this is over. Only a week, only a few days.
Maybe a nice bit of yelling would help me coping with this but then again it might be a little bit awkward since we never spoke to each other... or rather with each other. So I thought my actions would give you some kind of a clue of how I am feeling towards.... this. But maybe I was wrong there again. Since ignoring you didn't help I felt this glare was necessary and I was pretty sure from the look on your face that you had understood what I was trying to say. Obviously you didn't get it or you got it and I have no idea why you're keeping this whole thing up. I mean how am I supposed to get over this this way? It hardly seems fair.
I am not quite sure how I want you to act but definitely not this way! This is driving me insane. When I see someone who looks like you I am cursing him in my mind. Following every of his steps and hating each one. And believe me there isquite a number of guys that look like you. It can't go on like this... I know that. But then again I have no idea how to cope with this. And maybe that's why I am writing this. I know that you'll never read this and probably never know how I am feeling but maybe posting this will help me. Keep my mind at my side for another week, another few days....
And after all the only thing I can say is that I am hurt, that's all. I guess I will be alright right? Won't I?
"But you put on quite a show.
Really had me goin'
But now it's time to go,
Curtain's finally closin'.
That was quite a show.
Very entertainin'.
But it's over now.
Go on and take a bow."
-Rihanna
Maybe a nice bit of yelling would help me coping with this but then again it might be a little bit awkward since we never spoke to each other... or rather with each other. So I thought my actions would give you some kind of a clue of how I am feeling towards.... this. But maybe I was wrong there again. Since ignoring you didn't help I felt this glare was necessary and I was pretty sure from the look on your face that you had understood what I was trying to say. Obviously you didn't get it or you got it and I have no idea why you're keeping this whole thing up. I mean how am I supposed to get over this this way? It hardly seems fair.
I am not quite sure how I want you to act but definitely not this way! This is driving me insane. When I see someone who looks like you I am cursing him in my mind. Following every of his steps and hating each one. And believe me there isquite a number of guys that look like you. It can't go on like this... I know that. But then again I have no idea how to cope with this. And maybe that's why I am writing this. I know that you'll never read this and probably never know how I am feeling but maybe posting this will help me. Keep my mind at my side for another week, another few days....
And after all the only thing I can say is that I am hurt, that's all. I guess I will be alright right? Won't I?
"But you put on quite a show.
Really had me goin'
But now it's time to go,
Curtain's finally closin'.
That was quite a show.
Very entertainin'.
But it's over now.
Go on and take a bow."
-Rihanna
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